According to the Oxford English Dictionary, foster means “to encourage something to develop.”

Fostering a child is not simply providing shelter and meals.  It is so much more.  So what exactly does a parent foster?

Foster parents foster healing.

Foster parents foster self-esteem.

Foster parents foster healthy relationships.

Foster parents foster emotional intelligence and empathy.

Foster parents foster joy and curiosity.

Foster parents foster positive childhood memories.

Foster parents foster success- achievements along the way

He was so small!

Allison’s hands fluttered over of him, not sure where to touch.  He had a tube going through his nose and down the back of his throat, allowing him to eat.  He had a respirator to breathe, which he was weaning off of but still needed most of the time.  He had bandages on his legs where his IVs had been placed. 

The nurses took time and demonstrated how to hold him

Many folks want to foster, but they are not sure they have what it takes.  They question, am I enough?  Will I be able to do this?  Do I have what a child needs?

Let’s explore what kids in care need.  If you think it sounds like you, that might be a sign it is time to apply!

1. A Steady Presence: Children and youth in care have been through a lot.  While

“Oh, nothing going in my house, just the usual.  I don’t need to take up everyone’s time,” she said.  Her voice was upbeat.

As a Homefinder, it often surprises the families when I know about the goings on in their households. 

“I think you’ve got something pretty big coming up…Aren’t you taking guardianship of Big C?”

“Oh, that…Yep, that is coming up.  But it’s no big thing,” she deflects.  Foster parents so often shy away

She was only supposed to stay for the weekend.

I told myself the reason we were only taking short-term foster care placements was to protect the hearts of the children already in our home.

And if we used the term “foster friends” instead of “brother” or “sister,” nothing would get confusing. Right?

But perhaps I was trying to protect my heart as well. Although–how deeply could you fall in love in one week?

It was

On Friday, she will get the keys to her first apartment.

She will have all of the same butterflies as every young adult who has taken this step.  She will walk up the freshly shoveled path to the front stoop.  She will turn the key in the lock for the first time, swing open the door, and step into independence.

She is nineteen.  Most of her peers are still at home or in dorms for

At age 91, Nana decided it was time to retire.  She turned 90 last year during the early days of the pandemic.  We couldn’t celebrate her in the way we’d wanted.  Nana called us early on.  “I don’t think I should take any children right now.  It just doesn’t seem safe.”  We agreed. 

Nana was in her 60’s when she started fostering.  She’d always wanted to, but hadn’t had the time.  Her children were grown

What if there was one more bed?

One more bed for a 14 year old would mean that Kayla could step down from a group care program where she’s completed her service plan.  She has skills to manage her anxiety and a care team to support her.  She could live with a family while her biological family regains its footing.  She could feel a bit more like a regular kid.

One more bed for a

How long have you been thinking about fostering?  Is this a new idea or something you’ve considered for some time?

This is often the first question I ask folks, and the answer is almost always the same: years.  But they weren't sure they were ready.  They weren't sure they are enough.

They've spent years picturing what it would be like to prepare a room for a child, of the things they would do with a child or

“I’m her seventeenth.”

Foster mom’s voice was full of emotion.  My eyes widened, my skin prickled. “Seventeenth?  Home?”

“Yes, she’s seven, her sister is four, and I’m their seventeenth.”

A is seven years old and has lived in seventeen homes.  D is four years old and has lived in nearly as many.  For the seven year old, that means a new home roughly every four months.  For the four year old, that means a new